Idiocy

It's been one day. Hardly, actually. It hasn't even been 24 hours yet. Just felt the need to write, though at the moment I'm pretty devoid of sensible ideas. Preparing for that darn history lecture half-fried my brain. I need a little dose of fun in my life. A little carefree. Tomorrow there's basketball, but today? What to do, what to do. I have a problem. A money one. Can't seem to stop spending when I don't even have anything to spend. Argh, it's killing me. Another thing that's killing me is you and the thought of not being in this together when I've looked forward to it for quite some time. Why couldn't you have been the one, the good one, the one who makes true to promises when you've been speaking about truly wanting it? You got too careless, too messed up. And I was just all too happy to watch you go through it. Damn you and damn me for being so. This is pretty hopeless. Nonesense, bullshit. I hate being like this.